Wilderness vs. Civlization

Brad wonders how it is that I lived in the wilderness... 

went weeks without showering, 

no candy, 

no junk food, 

no toothpaste,

rocks for a bed, 

drank cow tank water,

wore dirty grimy sweaty clothes, 

slept with cochroaches in my sleeping bag, 

rattle snakes threatening me while checking my traps, (aka using the bathroom) 

tarantulas, 

being eaten by chiggers, 

living off the land, 

being rolled over by boulders, 

surviving off crawdads and prickly pears, 

crawling through catclaw, 

lovin' up dried tomatoes, 

encounters with cactus

and so many other things I dare not mention.  

AND I FREAK OUT WITH A FEW ANTS IN THE KITCHEN.